Hello there! I haven’t written here in a while, and I’m not sure you can really call it a blog if your last post is almost nine months old, but here we are. It’s my space, so I guess I can call it what I want!
So, speaking of blogs – a few nights ago, Tim and I were talking about blogging because I told him that I want to reestablish a regular writing practice in 2019, but I’m not sure what that looks like for me. I have big running goals for the year (I want to run 1,000 miles and I plan to train for a marathon this fall), but I don’t have a big writing goal in mind. I just know that when I write regularly, I feel happier, more connected to myself, and more energized in literally every other aspect of my life. Yet I often go very long stretches without doing it at all. And yeah, I know, I have a full time job and two young children, and a lot of stuff on my plate, but really, if I wanted to focus on it, I could.
When I’m really honest with myself and peel back the layers, what it really comes down to is fear. I’m afraid of not being good enough, or what others might think, or that I have nothing original to say, or a million other things.
That brings me to my word of the year, which is “curiosity.” I want curiosity to be a (the) leading force in my life this year. Instead of thinking, “I can’t do that” or “I’m not good enough” or “I’m too old to start something new” or “I’m too afraid,” I want to think – “What might happen if I try this? What might I learn from this? How might I grow? What might await me around the bend if I simply greet each challenge with an open heart and mind?”
(Side note: the inspiration for this word comes from Elizabeth Gilbert’s book, “Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear,” which I am obsessed with and have read at least three times. I highly recommend.)
So, back to the blog. If you Google “are blogs dead,” you will find about 319 million (literally) posts on the topic. With so many traditional and social media channels, it’s hard to break through the noise. People don’t read anymore. Bloggers have moved to “micro-blogging” on Instagram. And of course, there’s no money in traditional blogging, unless you’re very good and were lucky (and hardworking) enough to have built up a loyal following during the medium’s hey-day.
None of those things really matter to me. I like to write. I want to do it more regularly. I don’t want to wait until I feel like I have something profound or perfect to share. I want to be brave enough to push what I have to say out into the world. Even if no one reads it.
So here I am.
I’m not really sure what direction I’m going to take it yet, and if you get impatient with my fumbling rustiness, I completely understand.
But I think I’m curious enough to see what happens next.